Where to find a partner

I have never really liked going to loud bars and catching the eye of a stranger.  Instead I like context and hearing what they have to say.  In the olden days people used to advertise for a wife or husband.  These days we have the internet.  I was skeptical at first, but then really enjoyed my time on RSVP.  You have to be in the mood for it and be prepared for crazies, keen-as-mustard, rejection and an interesting journey.

What makes a good profile?

• 5 good photos of you doing things you enjoy (eg. at your favourite restaurant, doing sport, cooking, at a party, dressed up in an evening gown and also in casual everyday clothes)
• A good name that catches people's eye and make them want to know more (eg. CheerfulChick, HappyHarriet, a character from your favourite film, a mood or tone you would like to project, WhistlingWill, JollyJimbo)
• A fun, happy opening line or description that make people think "I want to read more"
• Information about what you like to do (eg. bake cakes, read books under a tree, listen to music at outdoor concerts, organise parties, drive up country roads, eat Indian cuisine)
• 3 or 4 paragraphs are good (interested types will read it) to give them an insight into what makes you tick and what they could expect from hanging around with you (e.g. I love to get up early and go for a walk or I read novels into the wee hours of the morning)...

How to sift through the good ones from the bad?

• Some people are obviously wrong for you (for example, if you are not sporty, a triathlete is probably not for you)
• Others will appeal, but not live up to their profile
• A couple will exceed your expectations (give people a chance)
• Some people are creepy (have pet snakes, don't wash their hair, eat only spagetti)
• There may be too little information on their profile (encourage them to write more)
• They may like something you hate, but if it is a song or a band, it is probably not a deal breaker… If they smoke, that might be.

Organising the first date:

• Pick a public place (eg. a cafe in a busy part of town)
• Meet for coffee (tea or a drink), so you can get away after an hour if it doesn't work out
• Always give them time (ie. they may be nervous, give them time to open up)
• Tell a friend or relative where you are going and give them the profile if possible (just in case)
• If you like each other continue on longer than the hour
• Let them know you would catch up again (or be reluctant if they are not right for you and you need time to think it over)
• Don't rule our friendship (if there is no spark)
• Be open and interested in them (don't talk about yourself for the whole hour)
• Dress nicely, but don't overdo it (sparkly evening wear will freak someone out at an afternoon coffee)
• Have fun and enjoy that the world is a place full of interesting people.